I love to watch graduations! Okay, maybe that sounds weird, but after all these years, that’s one of the few things that has held to tradition. Technology, bad parenting, and global warming have not changed it. No graduation is complete without a little pomp and circumstance (which truly makes it sound official), a shuffling single file line looking like they’re headed for their government cheese, the throwing of the mortar boards, and there’s always that fan with the air horn embarrassing their family member!
After 3 diplomas (that are collecting dust in my basement as we speak), I still love a bunch of supposedly intelligent people “dressing up” in robes, the funny guys that look like they’re naked underneath, wearing bowling shoes or flip-flops, the idea of a fresh start, and the messages on the top of mortarboards.
Yes, of all the things I love about graduation, I love the mortarboards most, probably because I so badly wanted to decorate mine and it was strongly discouraged. We did stupid high-5’s instead. Whatever.
Sure, there are basic ones like putting your name and year on it or some kind of farewell statement like “peace out.” There are Mickey Mouse ear ones, and I think one of my favorite ones I’ve seen was an aggie at Iowa State that made the top of his into a field and had a tractor and plow going across it. Very cool!
Go ahead and laugh, but I’ve actually pondered what I would put on mine. I’m sure my thought process has changed immensely since high school though. I have a feeling mine would have said something about friends in low places. Today, I think I might make my own out of duck tape or it might have a house of cards looking like it’s about to fall. I could go all GaGa on it and put a steak on it. If she can have a meat dress, I can have a meat hat, right? No Dr. Seuss caps for me or “Hire me!” shout-outs. I think I’d be more subtle like “Show me the $” or “The Farmer’s Daughter” or a simple “Count Me In!” Of course, I’m not above a “Take Me to Dinner!” or “Sup?” Then again, I think it would be funny to make it into a board game like Hungry Hippos or a 3-ring circus perfectly fit for my life.
But I’m betting mine wouldn’t be the most noticed, you know there would be that guy who realizes he should put a naked chick on his or Rodney Carrington’s “Show them to me!”
So in honor of decorated mortarboards everywhere (and my nephew graduating this weekend), I need to know what was on yours?
Or what you would put on yours if you had it to do all over again?
Or if you’ve recently graduated from the school of hard knocks or from the 24-35 age group or whatever you’ve “earned a degree in” – what are you sportin’ on your tasseled cardboard?