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They say how you bring in the new year sets the tone for the rest of the year.  First of all, don’t ask me who “they” are, and second of all, that might explain my 2012!

With that in mind, I’ve decided it is my job to offer up a few possibilities as to how to ring in the new year!  Why?  Well, mostly because I’m bossy, but also because I want your year to be more exciting than mine! Lol.  So I’ve put together a list of things you can use to entertain yourself, your guests, or your neighbors brought in off the street.   In fact, you might want to consider making it a tradition.  This shit is that good. Lol.

**Perhaps you could host a SWAP meet.  No, I’m not talking swingers.  Why not have a Christmas Crap Swap?  Everybody invited brings something they got for Christmas that they don’t really want and let the swapping begin.  Remember one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.  (Gag.  I can hardly say that without barfing…but it may be true.)

**You could have a midnight bocce ball game in the snow or sand depending on where you live!  Hey, there are those crazy folks who do the dip in the lake, but I’m all for not freezing to death, showing my pasty white legs late December, or getting deathly ill because I’m an idiot.  Just throw on the sexy ski bunny boots and mittens and go at it (and by “at it” I mean bocce ball,  With a few drinks, you may be inaccurate, but probably not cold!

**Host a cheap beer party.  Have all the guests bring the cheapest beer they can find and then test ‘em out.  It may taste bad to begin with, but I bet by the 6th one, it won’t even matter!  Break out the Schlitz, the PBR, the Keystone, the Meisterbrau and call it a par-tay!

**Find the pretty girls, or your friend that does Mary Kay, or bribe the girl at the counter at Dillard’s and have a makeover party.  Nothing like looking killer going into the new year!  Who knows?  Maybe you can finally get your husband to wear jeans that are long enough or shave off that winter moustache.  Or you can have a girls only party and send the boys to the basement with beer!  But if you wanna be lazy like the men, you can always have drinks and watch a season of What Not to Wear.

**Make it a calendar party!  Invite friends or family over to make calendars.  Have blank cardstock already bound together and have everybody scrapbook a page, draw on it (just understand you might snowflakes, clouds, smiley faces, and penises – you know, the things we learned to draw in elementary school), or add pictures.  Even better, take crazy candids and group shots of everybody, upload them to Walgreens, and order enough for everyone at the party.  Then send the sober person to go pick ‘em up before the end of the evening as a keepsake and have memories all year long.

**Feel like being a good person in 2013?  Host a “can-can” party, but make sure you have the right crowd…and by “right crowd” I mean a drunk crowd.  Have all your friends bring cans of food to donate to the local food pantry.  Then make sure the cans of alcoholic beverages are flowing freely and have a can-inspired talent contest.  With the right crowd, you’ll have Bob Ross-inspired can painting, juggling cans (yes, guys, insert your jokes here), constructing of can pyramids, possibly a really poetic ode de cans, or a can rap.  Lame-sounding, but drunk, you’ll be laughing your cans off.

**Wanna go really sentimental?  Make it a Dick Clark memorial New Year’s.  Have an evening of Dick Clark games – play Scattergories, your own version of $10,000 Pyramid, and a little record rating of songs “you can dance to” that “have a good beat.”

**Are you and your friends the New Year’s resolutions-making types?  You’ll be able to hold them to it if you have everybody write their resolution on your vintage etch-a-sketch and then snap a photo of them.  Nothing says “nailed” like photo ops with proof.  Oh, and best to give them a little 80 proof  before that so you get the fun photos!  Facebook will love you for that!

That being said, pretty sure my New Year’s 2012 will involve some TV with my hermit husband, a kiss good night at midnight, and a good night’s sleep.  There’s a tone set.  Happy 2013, everyone!


Anybody else have an idea they’d like to contribute or something your fam or friends do in honor of the big night?  Let’s hear ‘em.