Blah, blah, blah. I keep hearing people complain about the holidays. Well, pucker up, Buttercup and kiss my ass – less doggie jumpsuit (Can you even believe the stuff they have to dress up your pet???). The holidays are fabulous! Why? Well, right there was a perfect example, but if that’s not enough for ya, I‘ve got more!
10. For most everyone, it means at least a day or two off. Nothing says Christmas gift like not working! Woo-hoo!
9. Christmas music and bad singers. Yeah, you heard me. You’re either a lover or a hater. I’m a lover. A blizzard in Iowa? Hey, no worries. We can Mele Kalikimaka in the living room with Bing! And when that mom with 5 children flailing out of the shopping cart strolls by off-key and screwing up the words, I just can’t blame her. It’s probably that or her sanity. And don’t forget Christmas caroling – big fan, even though I sound like a cat caught in a car door!
8. Fudge. Need I say more? Well, unless it’s peanut butter fudge, hot chocolate cupcakes, chocolate covered pretzels… Seriously? How can that NOT make you love the holidays?
7. Bitchy people. I know. I know. But nothing brings out my warm tidings and season’s greetings like cranky ass people. It always makes me have the sudden urge to hand out beer and chocolate to people in need. Consider it my Hallmark Maxine moments.
6. Ugly Christmas sweater sightings. The best part about ugly Christmas sweaters is that you get to decide if they are wearing it to be ironic or wearing it because they don’t know any better. You can’t not have a good time sneaking pics of sequined poinsettia and cardinal sweaters and texting them to your best friend.
5. Church. Okay, call me sentimental, I know this is meant to be a funny blog, but I love Christmas eve services with mood lighting, twinkling lights, the nativity scene, and the bells at midnight (or 10pm because the blue hairs run the church – lol).
4. Christmas letters. I enjoy every last one of them right down to the bragging about their dog’s ability to wipe their kid’s butt because they’ve trained it so well. Go ahead and put it out there. I’ll read it. I’m good with having superhuman friends. You might come in handy someday!
3. The build-up. Who doesn’t love foreplay? The advent calendars, the Christmas parties, decorating the tree, making the Christmas cookies, shopping, Christmas tree light glow in the middle of the night…
2. Family bonding. What’s better than sibling bickering, warring card games, heavy drinking, and naps on the couch?
And finally, you gotta love…
- Santa Claus. Yes, people, let us celebrate when a man is encouraged to be fat and jolly and show up with gifts. I’m all for a man who’s big on gift-giving. You gotta love that.
Got some more reasons? Share in the comments below. Need a lot more reasons to try to get you in the holiday spirit? Then come on over and join all the people doing the Yo Ho Ho I LOVE Christmas Cheer-a-thon: http://www.facebook.com/events/339499016157550/. I promise it will bring you a smile or two! And if not, guess you can give all of us the big ole flip-off. Lol.