yes, i had big hair and stone-washed jeans. insert laughter here.

Do you hate having your photo taken?  Admit it.  Which are you?  The one that jumps in front of the camera when one appears or the one that hides?  Knowing most of you, I’d bet you’re the one that hides or tips your hat or hood down and flips off the camera.  Yeah, I know you.  I can see your guilt from here!

People who don’t like their pictures taken fall into one of three categories, or all:

Some think they look like shit – i.e. they need a haircut (oh Crystal Gale), they’re going to be the fattest one in the picture (hello, Santa), their teeth could use a small fortune in dental care (Rednecks at your service), or they’re old (yes, grandma, you’re turning gray, but haven’t you heard that it rocks to be 50 shades of gray these days?).

Or

Some people think their pictures will come back to haunt them and people will make fun of them for their dorkiness, their clothing, their terrible judgment in one-night stands, or their fun factor.

Or

They do not want other people to see what they are doing on facebook – i.e. having fun, drinking a beer or even worse, a girly umbrella drink, sporting a Billy Ray Cyrus mullet, or kissing the wrong boyfriend/friend with benefits.

Okay, I get it.  I was one of those people.  Which was I?  Most definitely group 1.  Oh, but I guess if I were truthful there was a Billy Ray Cyrus moment in there, too, but it was the 80’s so it should be forgiven, dammit.  But grumble-bunnies, I’m here to tell ya, it’s better to man up, place nice, and be picture perfect.  Besides, when that old mullet photo shows up, laugh with ’em (and seek revenge later)!

The truth is that I’m a reformed photo-dodger.  I, too, spent years disappearing to the bathroom when the camera came out.  Somewhere in this universe there’s a picture of me with a toaster cover over my head just because I didn’t want my picture taken.  Sad, but true facts.

Why should you change your tune?  Three reasons:

1.Someday, when you’re old and sitting in your rocking chair threatening hoodlums with your cane, it will be nice to have proof that you were fun, that you existed, that you had strawberry blond hair that one summer, that you went to the same camp as Michael Jordan.  You get the idea.

 

2.Being a pissy-pants doesn’t win friends or family. Ever!

 

3.2 words:  funeral photo!  You’re going to need a funeral photo and there’s no time like the present to start getting the best photo ever.  Sometimes you actually want or need photos of yourself (maybe not just when you die, but how ’bout that facebook profile pic, too?).  In my case, there better be a damn good photo of me when I die.  Let me go on record at this moment and ask that you not use any in which I’m in a mullet, leggings, or blue eyeshadow.  That’s all I’m sayin’.

And I’ll let you in on a little secret.  It’s the secret to successful footage.  Thanks to my husband, I learned the error of all our ways.  The key to a great photo is the double thumbs.  That’s right.  Every time someone asks my husband to take a photo, he breaks out the double thumbs-up with a big ole grin the size of dump truck.  And it works!

2 thumbs up!

You can’t look bad when you look like you’re having fun.  Plus, I’ve learned that nobody is busy noticing your bad teeth, your white hairs, or your double chin if they’re too busy wishing they’d been there because it must have been one helluva party with that smile!

Now as I would say to my family:  shut up and get in the picture already!

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