Grab your red solo cup!  We’ve got a summer to celebrate!

Rumor has it that some people actually have to work, but that’s not going to ruin our summer mojo!  Oh no!  You need the jet-pack to get the party goin’?  Well, here it is.  The all-things-summer post to get you started.

1st up:  Drinking!

As a big girly drink fan, I know many of us are excited to find a new beverage that applies.  This summer’s go-to:  Bacardi Limon and Pepsi/Coke/Coke Zero.  Perfect for a mixed well that you can actually get at EVERY bar.

Although still a huge fan of strawberry daiquiri Dailys, I’ve got options for all you cheap wine partakers.  Leave the box o’ wine and glasses at home.  Just pack your Arbor Mist pouches and go!

And if you’re more of an absolute ease can drinker (or a guy who has to look manly with tall boys in his cooler), you have to check out the Budweiser Margarita in a can known as the Lime-A-Rita.  My friends lived on them in Vegas!

But don’t be afraid to use that freezer!  Freeze your pop, your kool-aid, your Crystal light, oh, or that new Nestle Pure Life Splash in grape, lemon, or orange tastes fab!  Pull it out, chop it into a slushie, and add your vodka or rum.  Ta-da!  Kids won’t even know you’re on drink #5.

But drinking alone does not make a summer.  (Okay, so some of you might argue that point, but…)

2nd on the summer patio:  the proper music.

You mix your drinks.  I mix your playlist.  What will make it feel like summer 2012 on your stereo?  Here goes:

Red Solo Cup (Really?  How could it not be on the list?) – Toby                    Starships (beach party!)

We Are Young (if only this were true…ha ha.) – Fun                                         Dance Again (Latin heat) – JLO

Pontoon (layin’ out on the stripper deck, motorboatin’)                                                Ain’t in No Hurry (Duh!)

Somethin’ ‘bout a Truck (hike that red sundress)                                                              Call Me Maybe (or not)

What Makes You Beautiful (you gotta have a boy band!)                                              How We Do (Party!) – Rita Ora

Drunk on You (and high on summertime – oh yeah!)

Whistle (What’s a party without Flo Rida?)

Springsteen (oh, those memories will get cha in trouble!)

3rd on the summer hit list:  Water!

A drink in the hand and background rhythm can only mean you need to cool off in the water.

Go to the pool.  Go to the lake. Go to a water park or a wave pool.  Find a lazy river.  Grab your skis.  Hit the tubing trail or the tanking route.  Heck, fill up the baby wading pools in the backyard if you have to, but get your splash on Brad Paisley style!

4th place but not last place:  the lounge chair!

After water comes rest…(and probably another drink)  Pull out that lawn chair to lay on with your summer scent of Coppertone 45 and relax with a good book.  Need some summer reading?

Tearjerker:  Sisters Everlasting.  You’ll bawl like when your 16-year-old boyfriend dumped your ass.  It’s the turning 30 update of the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, but the pants are off and the Kleenexes are out!

Steamy smut:  If you haven’t already been hot and bothered by the Fifty Shades of Gray, then what in the hell are you waiting for?  Holy cow!  Go buy the trilogy.  It’s like 3 books of spring break jailhouse romping.  Perfect for you male readers to get some ideas, too.

Funny real-life shit:  Jeneration X is your ticket to laughter.  You won’t even remember it’s hot out!

However, I do not want you Kentucky fried in the sun, so make sure you wear your redneck chiller bracelets.  Grab a couple of your kids’ Mr. Freezes from the freezer and duck tape the ends together on each one, then slip on your wrists to keep cool.  If the pressure point on the insides of your wrists are cool, you stay cooler.  Nothing some duck tape and 10 cent Mr. Freezes can’t handle.  How’s that for kickin’ it old-skool?

And while you’re lounging on your chair, the spouse can be whipping up food on the grill.  Thanks to Ore-Ida making it simple for the hubs with their new griller line, he can make waffle fries on the grill to have with your steak and shish kabobs!  Mmmm….

Finally, the deal sealer of the Top 5:  the elite event

Anybody can hang out on their back deck with drinks, suntan lotion, snacks, and the baby pool, but you gotta have an outing to remember.  Summer is all about that random, unexpectedly fun jaunt you got conned into on the hottest day of the year so far.

So grab your cooler, your bag chairs, and your cash and find a concert, a 4th of July parade (see Oakland, Iowa), Shakespeare on the Green, a local flea market/farmer’s market, county fair, or a melon festival.  (Yes, boys, I said that just for you.)  You’ll find a new winery, take pictures of a scantily clad Speedo wearer, or pet an alligator.  There’s guaranteed to be something for you to talk about come Monday morning.  And if not, I guess you still have your redneck chiller bracelets. Lol.

Happy Summer 2012!

 

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