Okay, I’ll say it. The question is: will you? I’m completely willing to admit it whether anybody else will or not. I am totally freaking excited about new TV next week! Yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re all getting fat and stupid on TV. Well, guess what? Fat and stupid possibly, but quite comfortable in my recliner, thanks. Plus, doing a little hand-holding with the hubs. So suck on that, do-gooder, hippie non-TV-watching freaks! (Okay, fine, I completely respect people who try to be better than the commoners like me, but dammit, I love a good TV show and I won’t apologize for it.)
Hell, I was flipping pumped about the NFL regular season starting this week. I sat my ass on the couch and camped out through many an hour, but now the funny stuff is coming back and that makes the world even better! Sure, I’ll be sad to see Design Star and Hot in Cleveland take a vacay, but who is not happy to see Gibbs and Tony back at the NCIS headquarters? And don’t tell me you won’t be setting your DVR and prepping a special meal in anticipation for the return of Big Bang Theory (and feel free to have get a big bang as prep work. It’s a good excuse and no one’s here to judge). We had grilled wieners in honor of the NFL starting, but I’m assuming we can’t have cheesecake for Big Bang, because, after all, Leonard is lactose intolerant. I’m just saying we like to think of ourselves as “the supporting cast” so we do what we have to do here as Chez Carley. We will obviously be having slushies from DQ as we delve into the new season of Glee. Well, I will. At Chez Carley, not everybody is excited about the return of Glee. Not naming any names, of course, but some people don’t know a highlight when they see one. One thing we can agree on is that we haven’t quite decided what would be proper for Mike & Molly. I mean, do we go whole-hog with cake, cookies, and ice cream in their honor or are we supposed to respect their situation and go for a Jared-type sammie from Subway instead? I’m just wanting clarification. I don’t think that’s much to ask. Not that we have to shove food in our mouths while staring at all our new episodes, but well, if we’re gonna get fat and stupid we might as well do it right!
Of course, I know a bunch of you are all hopped up about Desperate Housewives, Grey’s Anatomy, and House coming back. Enjoy yourselves. I won’t be partaking with you, but I think you can handle those on your own. You are big boys and girls. But I do hope you’ll be checking out the new TV with me. Is anybody planning to tune in to The Playboy Club? I figure that’s one to dress up for, instead of eat for, although grilled wieners would probably be perfect for that show, too. Lol, but since it’s best not to try to be completely fat and stupid like they accuse us of, perhaps we should go with the lingerie look for the viewing party. (Just please make the viewing party a party of 2 or less. Thanks in advance for that!) Anyway, I’m kinda thinking I’m interested in it, just to see what it’s all about, because I’m guessing the boys will be set to take a peek at this one, too. What guy doesn’t like the secrets and scantily clad women they’re promising?
However, I’m even more interested in the new sitcoms. I love me a sitcom! The hubs and I are big believers that the more we laugh, the longer our marriage will last. So we take our comedy viewing seriously. I’m pondering catching the pilot of Whitney. I’ve got a soft spot for dry, sarcastic, harsh comedic women. Mmm… I wonder why that is? Plus, if she can hang with Chelsea Handler than I think she gets a chance to hang with me.
I will also be making room on the DVR for Up All Night. As my inside source, aka Mr. Carley, reported: Christina Applegate doesn’t pick shit to be in. Valid point, honey. I’m on board. The DVR’s set and we’re ready to spit our fat-free pringles out laughing. If she can pull of being a Bundy, she should be able to make this work!
I’m also willing to give Rachael Bilson a chance with her Sweet Home Alabama TV remake, the premise seems to be lacking originality, but cute cast members go a long way. However, there’s no way in hell that Sarah Michelle Gellar is getting my time. I like her, but her show sounds like what’s-her-face-from that soap that had 50 personalities and kept coming back to life. Yeah, no thanks. I also understand that there are going to be tons of vampires and witches and anything scary or sci-fi-ish because that’s what America wants right now, but this section of America wants to laugh or least see a little smoochy-smoochy with a hot guy. I’m just sayin’.
So yeah, you’re probably thinking I’ve given this way too much thought and I’m lame and pathetic to be this concerned about premiere week, but so be it. Are my priorities completely whacked? Quite possibly, but am I giddy like a first kiss behind the bleachers? Yep! So either park it on the sectional next to me or put your ipod on in the other room. You know where to find me, but don’t be surprised if the answering machine picks up. I’ve got some important things going on next week…